5 Customers Every Retail Employee Has Dealt With During Covid-19
Between the hoarders, conspiracy theorists, average joe, and confused teenager, this pandemic has unleashed the full force of humanity’s most idiotic onto the average retail worker. The unsolicited advice and the degrading of being open during a pandemic has only continued to worsen. Here are some of the types of people that I, and many retail workers like me, have dealt with these past few months.
Tin Foil Tom
From the 5G towers causing this sickness’, to Bill Gates being ‘the embodiment of the devil himself’, these people are filled to the brim with crazy. They approach you when they see you’re not busy (which in actuality means you are trying to juggle six other tasks at once). The rambling starts out very gently.
AND THEN THE CRAZY TRAIN ARRIVES FULL FORCE. And they do not care if you are trying to speak or do anything else of more significant importance, they must tell you and save you from the evil plot of the deep state and world domination.
You heard it from Tin Foil Tom first, ‘Make sure you go out and buy some real gold and silver, or else you’re done for.’
Hoarder Harry
This person must have robbed a bank before coming into the store with how much money they are about to blow on unnecessary supplies. Between toilet paper and toilet bowl cleaner, this person is going to make sure they have enough supplies to provide the entire state of Rhode Island with hand sanitizer.
Only to realize the second mortgage they took out to pay for everything is affecting them negatively and begin to believe they might have overreacted (just a little). They will try and resell or return the product in the coming weeks only to be told by companies that we are not doing refunds at this time.
Who Cares Carl
This is the person that has had no idea of the significance of the illness and is strictly under the impression that this is a “bad flu”. There has been no effect in their family and therefore this does not immediately concern them, so why should they care?
They live their life under the impression that they are invincible in life and nothing will ever affect them. Not even death at this rate.
They will then get upset if you mention that you have someone that has been affected by the coronavirus and blow it off as nothing.
Socially Deprived Sam
Those that have moved to online work and have been following a stay at home orders may have gone a little stir crazy. These people are simply at the store to try and make unneeded conversations with employees in uncomfortably close quarters despite the employee reminding them of social distancing.
They will then return to the store every other day to find the same employee and make no attempt to buy anything. Talking was the only mission behind leaving the house. There lies the question of how much work is this person getting done if they are constantly at the retail space.
Retail Ralph
The person you can look at and know they are suffering the same fate as you right now. Their eyes are sunken into their head and the will to live has left their body. They managed to get a day off from their retail position to come to a different retail location and stock up on something that they have desperately needed for weeks.
As they find that there is nothing left of what they need, they lock eyes with you in a sorrow based sigh. You then smile at each other, but quickly realize neither of you can see the smile behind your masks.
You then both turn away and cry silently (inside).
Be Mindful of Others
Regardless of any place you walk into right now, be sure to give someone the respect they deserve. This is a trying time for the world, something that has never been faced in modern times. While this article was written in good fun, these are real situations retail workers have had to deal with. Together while apart is the only way we can truly get through this.
